STR † THE FREEDOM BLOG©

Friends,

It’s very difficult to find a review of Linux free of ultra-leftist bias, which is why ShelleyTheRepublican’s annual review of Linux has become the most trusted source of truthful information about this operating system upstart: Christians the world over know that they can turn to STR for factual and unbiased reviews of the latest technology. That is why every God-Given year we like to compare the state of the art Linux and ask the simple question – is Linux ready for the desktop yet? So far the answer has been a resounding no. The freedom-hating red-communist Linux freetards have consistently failed to deliver compared to American free-market solutions such as Microsoft Windows. Our Christianity teaches us that redemption is possible. so this is why we are mindful to check that users of free-software have improved their ways.

When we last reviewed Linux we pitched the then state-of-the art “Ibex’s Ubutu Interpid” against Microsoft’s excellent flagship Windows Vista. We felt that Vista outclassed Ibex’s open source operating system, however we did note that since the Ibex operating system could be downloaded for free it may be suitable for non-business critical tasks (e.g. lightweight letter-writing, or web-surfing) – provided you can overcome it’s idiosyncratic user interface. We were not 100% uncritical of Microsoft’s offering: We felt that at the time Apple and Microsoft were both failing in terms of their provision of Christian oriented biblical software, and the important task of pornography filtering.

You may also remember that we promoted a stern criticism of Apple’s tendancy to appeal to the homosexual agenda with their range of candy coloured gadgets and open adoption of liberal values. Since then we are proud to say that Steve Jobs of the Apple company has listened to our sensible criticisms and developed a brand new product called the iPad with the needs of American Christians like ourselves in mind. As you may know for the last two months every bit of content on our site has been written on Apple’s 100% porn free device, which we agree is the obvious future of computing.

Meanwhile, Linux seems to have lost ground: A year ago we were told that Linux would soon be the dominant operating system on mobile phones: Even their staunchest adocate Google seems to have abandoned Linux in favour of it’s homage to iPhone called Android. Linux users seem to be leaving the operating system in droves, most likely as a consequence of the continued in-fighting between the various companies such as the business-oriented Red-Hat and the increasingly absurd maker of Ubunto which has just renamed itself to “Lucid Lynx”. A year ago Linux could be found on popular video-game consoles – even Sony who once promoted this freetard operating system have come to realize that free software is commercial suicide.

Incidentally, we tried to install this software without much luck: We were able to conclude that this African-made version of the Linux operating system we can confidently say it’s the President Obma of computer-programs: All ideology but rotten to the core. Nobody could enjoy this nigger-rigged operating system.

Our installation woes began right from the start: The install CD forced us to re-format the entire hard drive. It would not install on a perferctly normal Windows NTFS partition. The installation process asked us a bunch of pointless questions (such as where we live) – why not just make a version for Americans since few other countries can afford or know how to use computers. Next we had to wait for almost an hour as the CD drive copied thousands of meaningless files to the computer’s hard drive. As you may know, Ubunto are known for packaging their operating systems with hundreds of megabytes of bloatware with bizarre names such as Gnome, and Pidgin. Alas the documentation came with no freetard to English dictionary to allow me to make sense of this gibberish. How much simpler Apple’s model which is to simple ship the device with everything pre-installed!

A wasted hour later the system finally permitted me to login, boy what a disappointment. If we were under any doubts about the sanity of the developers before our suspicions were confirmed by the mass of swirling pink which is their excuse for a desktop. The disapointment was double since we could not find any means of installing software. The usual approach of browsing the web and then clicking on setup.exe did not work. Ubunto first complained that it did not have any Wine and then kept asking for me to type in “root password” – this was a bizarre charade of security especially given that the user-name I had created was not even called root! Why should a computer require wine in order to run – we have no plans to test the effects of giving wine to a computer.

After much research I figured that Ubunto intend us to use something called “Synaptic” to install programs: Compared to Apple’s lively market this synaptic is like a store in pre-collapse communist Russia. The presentation is awful and it lacks any of the software brand you or I might find familiar. For example a search for Microsoft Office will yield nothing of use. So what are we supposed to use for our word-processing? Ubuntu actually provide a number of word-processors the most well-known being Open-Office: You may remember that the bankrupted computer company Sun were so unsuccessful selling this failed product that they had to give it away. Linux users are used to this kind of thing, it probably explains why they are such losers!

What’s new in Ubunto? A spinning desktop, what must have begun as a practical joke actually made it into their release. This feature caused us to feel motion sickness. We are considering legal action against the developers.

Installing great Christian software on the iPad was a breeze: Simply activate Apple’s easy to use market icon and type in the kind of software you want. A search for the word “bible” gave us an excellent selection of bible quizzes, reference and concordance. You can even download a spoken word bible for when you want some prayerful bedtime listening. Apple’s iPad has everything that a Christian could ever need – simply the best selection of Bible related apps.

Since there are no apps worth speaking of for Ubunto – I expect that most people will use it for little more than browsing the web. Here parents should take note. Unlike the iPad which includes excellent porn filtering software Ubunto ships with nothing at all. We wondered if any of these ubunto people have children? Most likely they have already been sacrificed a pagan African god since they are apparently unconcerned by the needs of typical American parents. We found that it was possible to browse pornographic sites for hours and hours without any form of obstruction. The danger of this should be immediately apparent to any parent who does not wish their children to become pornography addicts.

Once again, we are forced to conclude that not only is Linux not yet ready for the desktop – it has entirely missed the boat. The desktop PC is dead – nobody uses them any more. Ubunto should be consigned to the scrap-heap of Ghetto technology and never considered again.

Yours in Christ,

Jimmy Goddard

This week’s email of the week, comes from Leeroy Winston, a fellow Christ Warrior who needs some help dealing with liberal bias in the classroom, fortunately STR.com is here to offer sensible career advice to fellow patriots:

From: Leroy Winston
To: shelley@shelleytherepublican.com
mycountry13@patriotmail.com
2009/01/26 8:17am

Hi i wonder if you can help me i’m currently undergoing college education doing a Cisco course in IT and as an avid windows user i’m a little dismayed to find my college tutor only seems to want to teach us linux os he keeps telling us that if you want a good IT job you need to know about linux as thats where the money is he calls microsoft an evil corporation that only people with little or no IT knollege use he even told me the xbox 360 runs on Dam Small Linux that can’t be true god wouldn’t let that happen i’m sure please could you find out and let me know if this travesty is happening.

Praise god,
Winston

Leeroy, you are absolutely right: Linux is great for calculating how much hemp-based tofu it might take to fill your bio-gas-powered eco-dome, but for all serious jobs you need a serious operating system such as Microsoft Windows. Your teacher has obviously smoked too much dope, and as a result has made a very common error… at least common amongst foolish liberals.

Linux is not, never has and never will be ready for the desktop.

Linux and Windows have been around for a long time… but why is it that nobody sensible uses Linux? It’s simply because Linux is still not yet ready for the desktop, the server-room or just about any environment where IT is critical. Anybody who thinks that Linux is ready for industry is obviously a fool and this foolishness will prevent him getting a job:

Not so long ago, we hired an intern to look after our growing computer systems: We narrowed our choice down to two candidates. One with a “mixed” skill-set of Linux and Windows, the other pure Windows. Naturally we ditched the Linux guy… after discovering that he thought “Gnu” and “Python” were acceptable technologies in the workplace we figured him for an obvious communist whose values were incompatible with our Christian values.

Linux is not, never has and never will be ready for the desktop.

Take our advice – the only job those Linux skills will get you is in some kind of hippie-commune… or worse, you might become a teacher in another liberal college where the government funds you to tell the same lies to yet more kids.

STR Action Alert:

• If your liberal teacher is persecuting you because of your conservative values tell ShelleyTheRepublican.com – we can help get your teacher fired.
• If you or anybody you know of using or advocating Linux, report them to the Business Software Alliance. Linux is an illegal derivative of SCO OpenServer, and therefore should be considered to be pirated software.
• Last but not least, PRAYER: Pray for their sinful souls that Jesus will guide them towards our Truth.

JG

An insider at Microsoft’s development team just leaked these exclusive images to STR – The Freedom Blog. A beta version of the new Windows will be released this December and the completed version 7 will hit the stores mid 2009.

Windows Vista already has a considerable lead compared to the major Linux distributions as well as to Mac OS X. IT specialists confirm that the new Windows will advance Microsoft’s lead in the field of consumer OS even further.

By the way, the design is just stunning! Take a look!

Images courtesy of http://windows7news.com