The Jenkem menace
Friends,
A new liberal drug craze called “Jenkum” is sweeping our nation – it’s a dangerous new drug and one ‘huff’ of it can kill or send the user completely insane – but thanks to liberal congressional stonewalling this drug is completely legal and your kids could be using it at school – we need to do something about it
Its effects last for around an hour and consist of auditory and visual hallucinations. A fifth-grader in Lusaka said of Jenkem to an WorldNetDaily reporter: “Old man, this is more potent than cannabis.”
Is your kid on the Jenk? A 16-year-old boy described his preference for jenkem over other inhalants, “With glue, I just hear voices in my head. But with Jenkem, I see visions. I see my mother who is dead and I forget about the problems in my life.”
Jenkem is made from fermented human sewage: A quantity of the substance is placed in a bottle and the fermentation-gasses are captured in a baloon. After two or three weeks of ‘resting’, the baloon can be tied-off and the collected jenkem-gas can be used to ‘get high’.
Our friends at the Crollier county Sherrif’s office issued this urgent warning about Jenkem abuse in Florida’s schools. Please download this, print it and circulate it to your school and any parents at your church. We must all be aware of the Jenkem menace. [Click on the image for a high-res version]
Like Jazz music, AIDS and heroin Jenkum has it’s origin in darkest Africa. This low-cost ‘high’ became the drug of choice for poor african street-kids. Owing to lax clinton-era immigration policies, many of these Jenkem addicts moved to America to live on benefits. They brought their disgusting habit with them:
Before long the craze spread to America’s African community where “loons” of “winnie” or “butwash” are exchanged for hard-cash or stolen car-stereos in covert Jenkem clubs. It’s not just African Americans: White kids whose minds have been poisoned by secular culture have been pressued into giving it a try – only they can know the true hell of a jenkum addiction.
Is Barack Obmama a “Jenkie”? We asked his campaign team if he had ever used the substance, however his team refused to comment. Obama’s refusal to comment on Larry Sinclair’s drug use allegations suggest that Barack Hussein Obama might only have been snorting crack to drive away the stench of huffing Jenkem during his homosexual encounter with Mr. Sinclair.
What are we to do? It’s time to unite and drive out this Jenkem menace from our schools, churches and towns. Please take a moment this week to teach your children about the dangers of huffing Jenkem. If you homeschool, I suggest you print out the warning leaflet above and discuss the dangers of addiction with your kids. Responsible Christian parenting will save your kids from this awful addiction.
Jimmy
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I agree that kids should not be allowed to get to drugs, but WHOA!! what do ya know? Its more slander cast toward Barack Obama! Do you have any evidence that Barack Obama used any drugs or had gay sex? NO!!!!!! (he’s happily married, by the way) He’s the only man who can help out nation recover from the horros of Dubya. Obama for president!
Obama 08!!
Freddy, we do not slander.
We merely report the facts: You decide.
Regarding Obama – the facts are that Jenkem is an african drug and Obama is of african origin. If you cannot see the connection there are thousands of patriots who can.
As Larry Sinclair often says: There’s no smoke without fire!
It’s jus’ un-American is wut it is. Whatever happen’d to the good ol’ patriotic “Pull My Finger”???
No wonder the kids today refer to their satchel of drugs as “poop.”
I read on that other conservative news site, Blogs 4 Brownback, about the other addictive drug of choice in elementary schools: the Sharpie. And this is the second time I’ve heard about huffing and puffing. It must be an epidemic if it’s all over the news all of a sudden.
I’ve never seen this Jenk stuff, but it seems that if we kept kids from getting their jenkie hands on balloons the problem would solve itself, no?
Barry H. Osama needs to be confronted with this issue. He already is very familiar with crack and gay sex according to Larry Sinclair. Does he also do this Jenkem stuff? And does he have any Sharpies?
Alan Keyes is looking better and better, even if he is colored like Barry.
Great reporting as always, Mr. Goddard. I hope that Billy Bob Neck uses his Godcast to get the word out. He’s got a loud voice that’s heard all over the world. His voice could help stem the tide.
For some reason, I don’t see many kids using shit as a drug
Where do you get the shit? In sewers where albino marijuana grows? LOL Talk about a “dopey” urban legend!
@ Jimmy: “we report the facts, you decide”
Been stealing slogans from fox news lately?
And saying that Obama uses an African drug because he’s of African heritage is like saying that George Bush (your beloved leader) uses all American drugs, such as tobacco, alcohol, and pot. Oh, wait, he’s already admitted to using WAAAAY too much alcohol at points in his life. That stuff kills brain cells, you know.
Obama ’08!!
@abbie and random Aussie/newzelander
sadly, I’m pretty sure this is no joke. I’ve heard of this before, and while it sure as hell isn’t happening in my school, I suppose it could be elsewhere.
Anybody ever been to 420chan?
Hmm, all right then. Let’s use that logic on G.W. Bush and John McCain now shall we?
Hippie-culture originated in America and Bush and McCain are American. There must be a connection.
Crystal Meth originated in America and Bush and McCain are American. There must be a connection.
Mormonism originated in America and Bush and McCain are American. There must be a connection.
The Church of Scientology originated in America and Bush and McCain are American. There must be a connection.
School shootings originated in America and Bush and McCain are American. There must be a connection.
Modern feminism originated in America and Bush and McCain are American. There must be a connection.
Greetings from liberal Holland,
Thomas van der Meer
Crystal Meth originated in America and Bush and McCain are American. There must be a connection.
Thomas, your logic is blatantly flawed – let me be clear, I am talking about AFRICA not America. Typical of a dutch dope-smoker not to see the difference.
Friend, are you huffing Jenk?
STRs latest poll:
Can Negress Condaleeza Rice Beat Up Al Sodder?
No – God does not like Negroes (43%)= 43% Racists
Yes – Negroes don’t fight fair (33%)- NO, not fair if you are a racist
Yes – America always triumphs (20%) – Yep, See Vietnam and Iraq
No – She’s a girl (3%)- So?
Total Votes: 30
A completely rediculous and Racist poll…As allways.
No trace of Christianity here…But that shouldn?Ǭ¥t surprise anyone….
/True Christian
@Freddy, “Jenkem” is an urban legend! In the 60′s,there were urban legends that smoking banana peels(serotin in peels mistaken for serotonin) and drinking bong water(THC not water soluble) would get you high! Times change and hoax “highs” get more disgusting! “Jenkem” is sewer gas which will only make you nauseous from the horrible smell! http://www.snopes.com/crime/warnings/jenkem.asp
wow you sicken me you racist piece of shizz and you say you are christian i am athiest and was raised racist but dude dont even think you are even half way cool or funny on some of the shit you say we dont need a black or female president in officw cuz i honestly think they would be assassinated from within obama seems a little toooooo terroristic to me with his shady past and clinton is too cocky…. i’ve said my piece and if you’d like to talk further my email will be attached
Very nice dissection, Thomas.
@jimmy: what the hell is the difference between something beginning in Africa and something beginning in america?
Very nice dissection, Thomas.
@jimmy: what the hell is the difference between something beginning in Africa and something beginning in america?
@abbie: yeah, the more I think about it the more ridiculous it seems. Your right.
sry for the double post.
i’ve never even heard of Jenkem.BAMM if you think that sickens you their marijuana weakening your mind and your morals that’s even worse but it’s funny to.lol
How disgusting! Once more this shows that nothing good comes from Africa. These damn negroes did it again!
Shame on them!
No wonder God punished them by making them black!!!
Shelley
Freddy, Sarah and Bamm – you may laugh now but it will be too late for your kids when the hospital calls you to tell you they are in a coma from huffing jenkem. I did not make this up, I got this from some police officer friends in Flordia. Please click on the image in this article and download the report about Jenkem. This is serious.
hey man i am using jenkem every day and it fucking rocks its totally cool and its natural nothing wrong with it its cheap and natural and cant make you sick and you dont have to find a fucking drug dealer and its so good man it gives you a hell of a trip i got the idea from my big brother in the military they do it in iraq and they fucking love it it gives them the strength to survive this fucking war man its so cool rock on gotta do another jenkem hit man and then i have to take a fucking dumb and prepare some more jenkem man i am so fucking high man ok i am just 15 and i am a girl but so what nobody can stop me from taking a dump and getting fucking high man i just love it fuck this i love it shit and piss and it makes you high you know if this works it means that god wants us to get high if you can get high that easy haha love it i will be able to get high whenever i want and nobody can fucking stop me and if my parents would even try to stop me i would kill them and i will shit on them and then i would let them ferment and get high hahaha fuck then shit on them i dont give a fuck i would shit and piss on my dads face and i would fucking enjoy it whatever it takes i dont care at least i would get fucking high whatever man fuck it
first jimmy i do not have kids and neither do i want them.two and i actually was talking to BAMM when i typed lol that was for him and not you.
can i ask you a serious question shelley and i ask this in a politeful and respectful manner if your not a racist then why do you make racist remarks in comment #21 now i asked you this in a polite manner?
i wasn’t even talkin half way about the jenkim thing i was talking about the F’n person who wrote this shitty onesided story and their racist ways damn ppl read wut i wrote and mary jane does the body good…..ha ha ha ha ha a bowl a day will keep the doctor away
Sara/Darth,
I ain’t no racist. I love negroes but I am a realist. Let me know ONE good thing that ever came out of Africa, just one!!! There ain’t none. NONE! African are useless, lazy, stupid, stinking bastards that start one war after another!
And there ain’t no such thing as “half negro” or “12.5% Negro” or 45.8% negro. You either are a negro or you ain’t. It’s the one drop rule! Grow up, you stupid person of color.
Shelley N. Goodman
Jimmy, I sure as hell hope I don’t have kids, seeing as I’m 14. Yeah, that’s right, a 14 year old is smarter than you. Aren’t you ashamed of yourself?
@Shelley: “I ain’t no racist.”
Ok, hold on. Let me get the links to all of your racist articles.
http://www.shelleytherepublican.com/category/negroes
done.
Oh, and your current poll is racist, too, bitch.
Freddy,
how dare you, you little spoiled brat!
Read our Terms of Service. You ain’t even allowed to read this blog.
Now go to bed you stupid child!
Shelley
hey Shelley, guess what? Its a free country (like you always brag about). I can do what I want. Do you really want to try to violate the bill of rights?
And no, I dont think I will be going to bed, because right now it is 5:47 my time. (pacific in case you dont know the conversion). Hey, wait, I fan use my first argument again here! Its a free country. I’ll go to bed when I want.
people just laugh at her that’s just all about you can do is laugh at her. and shelley i am white if you were calling me a stupid person of color and i doubt you were but if you were i am white.
Good idea, sara. I’ll just laugh at her.
Silly baby Freddy, while Sister Shelley can’t make you go to bed and she can’t keep you from babbling your baby prattle; she DOES run this Godly blog and has the right to do as she wants here. If I were her, I’d go in and “edit” all you posts for my amusement. Be glad she’s nicer than I am.
Brother bob, as an american citizen, I have the right to free speech. I can say what I want when I want where I want. If Shelley or anybody else was to try to take away what is my constitutional right, I would not be happy. In fact, I am pretty sure that I would be able to find a way to make you unhappy about what you did to me. *cough* lawsuit *cough*
“Is Barack Obmama a ?¢‚Ǩ?ìJenkie?¢‚Ǩ¬ù? We asked his campaign team if he had ever used the substance, however his team refused to comment.”
That?Ǭ¥s because they don?Ǭ¥t talk to obviously completely deranged fundienuts.
hahahahahaha deranged fundienuts i love it.XD
YAY JENKEM! =D
-Jer Snider
Well, Darth, I really would, but I don’t feel like going to jail. Sorry. Of course, if I could figure out an untraceable way… (Just kidding. Please don’t take this as realistic and try to find me and get me arrested, Shelley. Even if I hate you, I wouldn’t kill you.)
now that would be a very good explanation lol.
“Let me know ONE good thing that ever came out of Africa, just one!!!”
1. Building Basics (Ancient Egypt)
2. All people came from Africa
3. Ubuntu
very nice carlos keep up the good work.
@Carlos i love your comment especially about building basics (Ancient Egypt) i myself love ancient egyptian history those people were and still are very intelligent human beings and i’ll always think that.
About jenkem – its only urban legend, only fake. )
Sara, pls email me to mezon@linky.ru
@carlos what do you need to e-mail me for :).
i meant what do you need me to e-mail you for? :)
All my children of STR. I have a wonderful idea. Let’s make STR into a liberal blog!
Hackage, and billy bob neck, your campaign song is shit
that’s a good idea.
email me yours contact info like icq uin or some
I am just curious, how does removing one’s freedoms, result in a free country? Please explain, I could never figure that one out.
@Salokin
Actually the Jenkem in the US started at TOTSE.com! eat that channers!
I love the look on that kid’s face,it’s fucking priceless!
Jenkem is a threat that must be stoped!!!
@Jesus rulez 3000 your a threat and you should be stopped.
fuck jesus and fuck you
Sara, as much as i disagree with Shelly’s racism/ignorance/propaganda/extremism. She IS the owner/operator of this site. Free speech doesn’t mean you can walk into somebodies house (or web domain) and insult them. If you REALLY wanted to you could report this site with a government agency for spreading hate (I’m not sure which one as I am not from America) When you enter this site, you are subject to its terms of use.
As an analogy, the second amendment give you the right to bear arms, not the right to murder people you disagree with.
@Cidkh2 fuck you i can say what i want whenever i want idiot.
and don’t tell me what to do STR brings the insults on themselves i do not feel sorry for them any way shape or form in fact they deserve to be insulted and they do not deserve respect for that matter either.
so Cidkh2 don’t you tell me what to do i have a right to say what i wanna say so do not talk to me anymore moron and you can bite me for all i care.
and another thing Cidkh2 i am not sorry for all the insults i throw at shelley and those other dumbass republicans and i won’t apologize for it either when it comes to STR i feel no remorse for what i say to them cause they are not deserving of kindness or tolerance. other then them what i say to others if they get offended i do feel remorse for but not STR they can rot in hell for all i care.
and Cidkh2 reporting this site will do no good it would be violating their freedom of speech and as much as i fucking hate those pricks STR has the right to express their opinions and has the right to freedom of speech.they are nothing but a bunch of arrogant pricks and will never get any respect from me.
STR enjoy that cause this is the only time that i’ll be
nice to you.
so seriously Cidkh do not ever talk to me and if you don’t like my comments then don’t read them yeesh.
Boy, three replies in 23 minutes, I sure pissed you off.
“so Cidkh2 don’t you tell me what to do i have a right to say what i wanna say”
True. however the STR terms and conditions allow the operators to edit your posts, delete them, w/e. In fact, by your admittance you aren’t even allowed to be here because you are underage.
“and Cidkh2 reporting this site will do no good it would be violating their freedom of speech”
The willful spreading of hate is not allowed by your freedom of speech, so you COULD report them, no guarantee any action would be taken against them.
“they are nothing but a bunch of arrogant pricks and will never get any respect from me.”
Because I’m sure people are just lining up to earn the respect of somebody as prestigious as you.
Also let me quote an excerpt of the terms and conditions of this site, just for chuckles
“4. You understand that by using the Web Site, including its Forums, comment pages and chats, you may be exposed to Content that is offensive, indecent or objectionable. If you feel offended by the content or parts of the content you have to leave. Str is strictly satirical, nothing on Str shall be taken seriously. If you are unable to comprehend this concept you are forbidden to view any website content. Under no circumstances will we be liable in any way for any Content, including, but not limited to, for any errors or omissions in any Content, or for any loss or damage of any kind incurred as a result of the use of any Content posted, emailed or otherwise transmitted via the Web Site, including its Forums. “
This blog is so far off from responsible reporting of “facts” that I really hope wish it was just for fun, but sadly, there really are people this stupid and although ignorant, they are can sometimes be good at spreading there stupidity all over the internet….I think I will come back here often to pester these people, and hope that one day they might become educated and enlightened on how stupid their views are!
i’m gonna punish shelly myself, and make her black. with my hot curry poop. all over her toilet spouting face.
HAIL SATAN
What a looney ass site.
Are you a Jenkie, you Republikan piece of poop? Dubya and the rest of those YALE queers are the ones swapping spit and and laying in coffins as an oath of secrecy and homosexual extortion as an act of loyalty.
OBAMA.
09.
YOUR NEW PRESIDENT.
GET OVER IT!
Jenkum is the figment of someone’s imagination to display the ridiculousness of the WAR ON DRUGS. Jenkum was started as a JOKE by someone I have talked to personally, you can find him on the &Totse message boards, he goes by the name Pickwick. Its crazy how this obvious joke has gotten out of hand, and taken seriously… Anyone who would use their own shit-gas as an inhalant obviously has some very, very deep mental issues…
But not as deep as someone who, say, BELIEVES IT…
Paul
I disagree with the your statement that your crazier if you believe this rather than if you actually ferment and inhale your own fecal matter.
To me the latter seems much more outrageous
being a cynic by profession i find displays of lack of intelligence and general stupidity to be rather funny…. therefore i find you even more of a comic than rush, sarah, and glenn all put together…..
but somehow try and come up with some new material, your paranoia driven babblings are getting dull…. if you will succeed you need new material …
This is not only a racist blog (darkest africa?), it’s full of every cliche you can find under a republican sun, including having nothing better to do than ask the president’s campaign team ridiculous questions. This time, if he’s ever sniffed shit.
The downside of technology: even idiots get a voice.